April 26, 1997 (Day 38 – milepoint 394.8 – Moreland Gap Shelter)

Highlight of the day: A magical little valley filled with apple trees, dogwoods, and honeysuckle. Numerous piles of rocks scattered everywhere, making it look like an old graveyard. Maybe an old Native American burial ground? Definitely one of the most beautiful spots so far. I spent about an hour there, doing nothing.

Now I’m laying in my tent feeling more tired than any other day so far. I got ambitious and thought it might be a good day to cover a few extra miles since the profile map indicated pretty mild terrain with no big climbs.

The profile map was misleading.

When I stumbled up to the shelter, I declared my love for everyone in it, removed my pack, set up my tent, crawled in, and moaned for a while. I could have stopped a few miles back when my feet said stop, but my lazy, stubborn ego wanted the miles and the shelter.

Papa Smurf, cozy and comfortable in his sleeping back, summed things up by saying, “Do you know why the moron continuously beat himself over the head with a hammer? Because it felt so good when he stopped.” I’m too tired to care that he just called me a moron.

Aquaholic

April 26, 2009

Hey Aquaholic,

The other day, Kai said to one of his friends, “I’m glad my mom and dad are getting a divorce. They’ll stop arguing and I’ll have more space for my Legos.”

I know my divorce is probably a good thing for both me and Sharon in the long run, but I am still traumatized by it. It is an emotional roller coaster ride. Our initial divorce paperwork has been submitted, so being truly in the process has both a positive and negative affect on me from day to day.

Therapy has been helpful, but, twice now, my therapist has suggested I speak with my doctor about depression. I went once and was sent home with fish oil, packed with brain-healthy Omega 3 fatty acids, which I must say made a difference. I felt more solid inside my head. But, it hasn’t been a cure all and some days I still get paralyzed by all of the emotional weight.

I need to be able to keep tackling all of this somehow. I need to be able to maintain focus. So, reluctant, but curious, I have another appointment tomorrow.

O’